Saturday, December 31, 2016

The 2016 Jimmy Awards: Best Album / Chip Combination

Winner: Iggy Pop & Old Dutch - Post Pop & Chips Depression

Iggy Pop is still alive? was Serge's first reaction to hearing Iggy's latest album, Post Pop Depression. His second was a wave of nostalgia (expressed as a sneeze), for he had also opened a bag of Old Dutch Salt n' Vinegar chips, and a familiar acidic punch had just hit his nose.

Serge soon realized how much Old Dutch and Iggy Pop have in common. Both have punk roots from Midwest assembly-line inspirations, and both have stuck around long enough to become the low-rent elder statesmen of industries otherwise dominated by glamour and flash. They use only a few key ingredients, and rely instead on a simple combination of maltodextrin-based flavour-coating backed by a strong crunch. And like ravaged cadavers from yester-year, they have staggered to the stage in 2016 to claim the honour of this year's Best Album / Chip Combination. 

We'll admit it: although very good, there are probably better albums and better chips out there. But strangely, none are as relevant. Why? Nostalgia. These two understand our current obsession with the past, and they're taking all of our preoccupied insecurities and feeding them back to us, chip by lip-blistering chip, line by acrimonious line. They are, at the same time, contributing to and satirizing the cultural time warp that we are currently living in, where teenagers are refusing to become adults and adults are refusing to become seniors and seniors are refusing to die. Iggy and Old Dutch know that in a world of change, everything must remain the same, and oh how we all love it.

Maybe one day, when Iggy finally croaks, we'll all grow up, like some bizarre sequel to the classic film Hook. But the way he is outlasting everyone else, that day might never come. So for now, we'll continue to revere albums by aging rock stars and eat chips 'til our bellies hurt.
Our Favourite Albums / Chips of the Year:

1. Iggy Pop - Post Pop Depression  /  Old Dutch - Salt n' Vinegar
2. Rhoneil - Nature // Cosmos  /  Dutch Crunch - Sea Salt & Malt Vinegar
3. Preoccupations - Preoccupations /  Kettle Brand - Classic Caesar
4. Wizaard - Starfish Buffet  /  Kettle Brand - Hawaiian Barbeque
5. David Bowie - Blackstar  /  Que Pasa - Ancient Grains
6. Aidan Knight - Each Other  /  Lays Original - Ketchup
7. Black Mountain - IV  /  Garden of Eatin'  - Sesame Blues
8. Your Boy Tony Braxton - Adult Contempt  /  Pop Chips - Barbeque Potato
9. David Vertesi - Sad Dad Cruise Ship  /  Sun Chips - French Onion
10. The Growlers - City Club  /   Doritos - Green Bag

No comments:

Post a Comment